Dignity In Death...Knowing when to let go

Anja's time had come, 6 months after a fatal diagnosis of kidney disease, her body could bounce back only so many times.  Each time, I thought my wife would be calling me at work but Anja always seemed to be active and eagerly awaiting me at the door.

But now, two days gone by and she was not greeting me, not doing the happy dance and after my wife had returned from a week away, even I had to give up hope as she could see the obvious.

I came to the vet's office, they brought her in and she came to us, letting us pet and talk to her but the grief was too much for my wife who being a full time dog boarder, was home with her much more than I.  She took some photos for me and then left.  I too didn't want to see her pass but I knew in my heart that the last thing she would want to see was me stroking that groove between her eyes and talking to her. 

I had 20 minutes with her hugging in that way she loved so much.  She liked being held by me, with her paws and head over my shoulder.  I posted the photos and a comment that it was time on Facebook so that all her human friends could know she would soon be free of pain.  I then stood her up and bending down to be eye to eye with her, I said, "Anja, We did every thing we could do and we just don't want you to suffer".   The vet came in, she glanced at her, then back to me.  I picked her up and put her on the table. "lay down sweetie, it's time."  She eased down and kept her eyes on me. I lowered to a eye level position and spoke to her about finding Mollie and Natasha, our cats who pass years ago.  Go to the rainbow bridge every day and wait.  All the while, people was posting comments causing a little bell to go off.  I told Anja that those bells were her friends ringing the way for her to find relief and that she was loved by many many friends. 
As the injections went in, I marveled at her dignity in death, never quaking, never wimpering, never fighting it.  She was at peace with the fact that no more would she lead the dogs racing around the yard, watching over the little iggies in case she needed to break up a fight, laying on the corner of our beds staring at the door always the guardian of our home.

Her last seconds, I stroked her face, told her to wait for me and then her eyes lost the blue hues that was everyone admired so much...

.......and she was gone, quietly, courageously and as a true champion of man's best friend.